"The Birds and the Bees"... and me

These days it seems that to talk about sex is like talking about the weather. Which made me wonder, was I the only one in the world that hadn’t a clue about what happened behind bedroom doors only I got married? Couldn’t be…not possible…but then again…..maybe.

My mother and I never had that girl to girl talk as I was growing up. What I knew about the “birds and the bees” only came to me by what we were taught in Sex Education class…6th grade I believe. Not being the curious type and shy (turning all shades of red) those thoughts didn’t enter my mind. Strange, now that I think back on it.

"Interesting...I'm supposing."

I can honestly say I never saw my parents in any compromising situations…EVER. As far a as I knew they only had sex once in there life and look what happened..ME! What a nightmare…hahaha! Did you ever catch your parents in the act?

These traits continued on between my daughter and me. We never discussed what happened between a girl and boy. Heck, the natural changing of the body was never brought up for that matter. Why is that so hard for some? Is it the sheltered life you lead? Or are we all differently made up to how curious we are?

Many years after I was married the issue came up. Can’t exactly say how, but from that conversation, I did get that my mom hated sex. She only did it because if she didn’t maybe my dad would go astray. Kind of sad, when you think about it. Plus, her theory was, if you use it to much, it will break. Well now a day’s there is Viagra…so break away!

Thee... "Miracle Pill!"

I have change my view point some. Now with my daughter being 28, her and I have had some rather interesting talks….Gees…. her wisdom blows me away… !!! At first it was a bit interesting and we both turned many shades, kind of funny, but we had some good laughs. At the end of the topic her comment was “I’d never thought I would be telling and/or giving my mom advice”! You know, me neither!….hahaha

However, all of this has been a hinder for me in my own walk. Not opening up early on in my marriage, has kept certain doors shut with my own relationship…and this after almost 30 years of marriage. To talk freely about what I might want or like will always be kept inside. I do believe that part of this now has to do because I know how my partner thinks….and most likely would wonder where this is coming from. He would say something like this “You’ve always been satisfied….what gives? “I’m suddenly not good enough anymore?!?” Also he’d probably would frown down up on it.
"Never changing?"

" Oh yeah...baby!"

His ego would take a dive. I know this from something I had done…simply by giving him a special book on how to spice up life as a Valentines gift a few years back. It didn’t go over very well. Making little hints here and there…the reply is “yea, yea”….but it never changes. Why? What does it take? Or is it the old saying “You can’t teach an old dog new tricks”! Seriously, I do believe that’s true. But he has noticed I’ve changed…slowly but surely. Past few years I have found a more confident me. Seems I’m not the same daddy longlegs that I was in school. The nerd with red hair an a funny name. Must be age….if you don’t like me and what you see…”Go fly a kite” or better yet “Take a hike on a short pier” See confidence!

"Changes"

But from time to time I’m still in a box looking out and wondering…..”IS IT ME?”